Nishmat's Women’s Health and HalachaIn memory of Chaya Mirel bat R' Avraham

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Shalom bayit & contraception

13 March, 2005


I am in my mid thirties and happily married with seven children. I would like to continue having children, but my husband feels very strongly that he can not take on any more responsibility. Is it correct to tamper with my shalom bayis over this issue?


Assuming you have at least one boy and at least one girl in fulfillment of pru urevu, you are permitted to place shalom bayit ahead of having more children.  Shalom bayit should be both ensured before bringing a new child into a family and preserved for the sake of each child already in it.

If you and your husband disagree, your best option is to pursue a solution in a way that maintains your shalom bayit.  For example, you could consult with a rav whose counsel you both respect, or you could seek guidance from a professional counselor.

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