Nishmat's Women’s Health and HalachaIn memory of Chaya Mirel bat R' Avraham

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Mikveh after abuse

1 February, 2007


I would like to know if I must starting counting my seven clean days on time or if I can push it off. While I was a niddah my husband beat me up (touching me) and left black and blue marks on my body – I am really embarrassed for anyone to see me this way and therefore don’t want to go to the mikvah (I really don’t feel like going anyway). Also if I do have to go, can I push it off until the swelling goes down and the marks fade?


We are so sorry to hear of your situation.

Halachically, your husband’s actions were absolutely prohibited. You are permitted to delay mikveh immersion indefinitely in this scenario.

We are concerned for your safety, and urge you to seek help. There are organizations that might be able to assist you, whether by hearing you out with understanding or by helping you to change your situation.  These include the Crisis Center for Religious Women in Israel, and the Shalom Task Force in America. Both operate telephone hotlines, and can be reached online or by WhatsApp..

Please do not hesitate to be in further contact with us.

This response was updated on 24 November, 2020.

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