Nishmat's Women’s Health and HalachaIn memory of Chaya Mirel bat R' Avraham

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Avoiding recurrence of dam betulim

24 January, 2011

Question:

I am a recent kallah who experienced a few days of bleeding (dam betulim) after the first time we had relations. After waiting the 4+7 days, I will be going to the mikvah this week. As we prepare for second time, we are concerned about experiencing additional dam betulim bleeding. If that happens, do I become niddah again immediately? Are there ways to decrease that chance? Thank you.


Answer:

Mazal tov on your recent wedding!

Given that you already completed an act of relations and already separated for dam betulim, you are correct that your primary concern now should be minimizing the chances of recurrence.  If you were to find more dam betulim, you would have to separate again.  In practice, you are not required to look for dam betulim now and you should seek halachic advice if any question arises. 

Your best bet is to have relations on colored sheets.  If you or your husband uses a towel at any stage, use a colored towel.  Do not perform a bedikah after relations.  Do not look for signs of bleeding and actively avoid looking for the first minutes after relations.  Review the laws of stains (ketamim) and take the usual precautions against becoming niddah from staining: wear colored underwear and avoid looking at toilet paper. Please let us know if we can be of further assistance.


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