Relations while staining

2 May, 2014

Question:

I am nursing a 3 month old, and have not had a period yet, but lately I am staining a lot. I am not using hormonal birth control. Two weeks ago I had a bout of staining for few days, and now again. It's 1–2 stains a day, and by now it seems very unlikely that an actual period is coming. Should we still refrain from intercourse? I understand that stains on the husband's body are complex – but what if we specifically avoid looking, and just shower right after?

Answer:

Mazal tov on the birth of your baby!

Staining such as you describe is fairly common post-partum, especially when there are changes to the nursing schedule.

It is preferable to refrain from relations within a day of staining, in order to avoid questions such as those you raise. Strictly speaking, however, having relations when a woman has staining that does not make her niddah is permitted.

You may use your judgment to determine whether the staining is tapering off to the extent that you feel confident having relations. You should take the following precautions:

use colored sheets
if you plan to clean yourselves off afterwards, wait at least fifteen seconds after separating and use tissues or colored cloths
avoid looking

As you suggest, you can also shower right afterwards, without looking.

Please write back with any further questions.

This internet service does not preclude, override or replace the psak of any rabbinical authority. It is the responsibility of the questioner to inform us of any previous consultation or ruling. As even slight variation in circumstances may have Halachic consequences, views expressed concerning one case may not be applied to other, seemingly similar cases. All health and health-related information contained within Nishmat's Women's Health & Halacha Web site is intended to be general in nature and should not be used as a substitute for consulting with your health care professional. The advice is intended to offer a basis for individuals to discuss their medical condition with their health care provider but not individual advice. Although every effort is made to ensure that the material within Nishmat's Women's Health & Halacha Web site is accurate and timely, it is provided for the convenience of the Web site user but should not be considered official. Advice for actual medical practice should be obtained from a licensed health care professional.

For further questions or comments:

The Nishmat Women's Health and Halacha Site is a public service of Nishmat, The Jeanie Schottenstein Center for Advanced Torah Study for Women. This project and others like it are made possible by contributions from people like you. If you have benefited from the service, and wish to enable us to help others, click here to donate.

Users of Internet filtering services: This site discusses sensitive subjects that some services filter without visual indication. A page that appears 100% complete might actually be missing critical Jewish-law or medical information. To ensure that you view the pages accurately, ask the filtering service to whitelist all pages under yoatzot.org.