Nishmat's Women’s Health and HalachaIn memory of Chaya Mirel bat R' Avraham

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Coping with divorce

22 July, 2021
Question:

My husband recently asked for a divorce. It was a complete surprise. We have a 9-month-old baby. We live in Israel; my family are in the US and also most of my friends. I don’t know what to do, I’m crying every day. I’m too embarrassed to tell my family. How do I deal with this situation?


Answer:

We are so sorry to hear of your situation.

If your husband is willing to try marital counseling, we strongly recommend giving it a chance. If he is not willing, we urge you to go to individual counseling to help you process what is going on, and to be emotionally healthy and strong, for your sake and for your baby’s sake. Referrals for counselors can be found at www.nefesh.org or www.gethelpisrael.com. You can also check with your kuppat cholim, and see if your city’s municipality offers subsidized therapy,

As embarrassed as you are feeling, having a strong support system is critical; you are a vulnerable woman with a young baby, alone in a new country. Reach out to your family and close friends, you did nothing wrong, you need their help and support right now. You should also look into consulting a lawyer. If you are unable to pay for a lawyer, the government offers free legal services from Siyua Mishpati.

Please feel free to get back to us with any further questions.

We wish you much strength and hatzlacha.

This internet service does not preclude, override or replace the psak of any rabbinical authority. It is the responsibility of the questioner to inform us of any previous consultation or ruling. As even slight variation in circumstances may have Halachic consequences, views expressed concerning one case may not be applied to other, seemingly similar cases. All health and health-related information contained within Nishmat's Women's Health & Halacha Web site is intended to be general in nature and should not be used as a substitute for consulting with your health care professional. The advice is intended to offer a basis for individuals to discuss their medical condition with their health care provider but not individual advice. Although every effort is made to ensure that the material within Nishmat's Women's Health & Halacha Web site is accurate and timely, it is provided for the convenience of the Web site user but should not be considered official. Advice for actual medical practice should be obtained from a licensed health care professional. For further questions or comments:  The Nishmat Women's Health and Halacha Site is a public service of Nishmat, The Jeanie Schottenstein Center for Advanced Torah Study for Women. This project and others like it are made possible by contributions from people like you. If you have benefited from the service, and wish to enable us to help others, click here to donate.
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