Nishmat's Women’s Health and HalachaIn memory of Chaya Mirel bat R' Avraham

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Modest conduct

12 January, 2005
Question:

Hi!

I am a kallah, and getting married in nine weeks Imyertzei Hashem. I have several questions, and I will greatly appreciate if you can provide me with clear-cut answers!

1) I heard that it is against modesty, and not a good segulah to discuss maritial halachos, niddah laws, etc. with friends without any reason. Is it really considered nivul peh?! Like if someone asks me questions ( for no specific reason) about family purity, am I supposed to refrain from answering?

2) Am I allowed to kiss my husband whenever I like, (of course when I am clean) or are there times when I should refrain from doing it.


Answer:

1) There are no strictly halachic constraints on discussing the laws of taharat hamishpachah in a dignified manner.

Your understanding of modesty should inform your decisions of what to discuss and with whom. Intimate matters between you and your husband should be kept private, unless there is a clear need. 

2)  If you are not niddah, there are no strictly halachic constraints on kissing, within the limits of common sense and modesty, e.g., not during the bedtime recitation of Shema, nor in public.

Mazel tov!

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