As mentioned above, a woman becomes niddah at some point in the childbirth process. This status limits some interactions between the birthing woman and her husband in two significant ways. They are prohibited from physical touch, and she should maintain some degree of modesty in his presence. He is also specifically prohibited from viewing her vaginal opening.
For this reason, halachic authorities initially did not permit a husband to be present in the delivery room. (Before the mid-20th century, this would have been a rare question, as husbands were generally relegated to the waiting room independent of religious considerations.) In recent decades, as the husband’s participation in labor and delivery has become accepted and even expected, halachic rulings have become more lenient. We follow the halachic position that the husband may be present in the delivery room, with the following limitations:
- The husband and wife should take care to avoid physical touch whenever possible once the wife becomes niddah.
- The husband should endeavor as much as possible to position himself so that he does not see parts of his wife’s body that are usually covered. A standard hospital gown often provides sufficient coverage.
- The husband should not directly view the baby emerging from the mother’s vagina, such as seeing the baby “crowning.” Rather, he should stand by the mother’s upper body or head, and should take care not to look directly at her genitalia, even via a mirror.
Because a woman in childbirth has the halachic status of a person who is ill, the couple are permitted to pass objects to each other directly.
A couple should plan for labor taking into account that, at some stage, the couple will not be permitted to touch. Often, planning includes a female relative or doula to be available to assist the wife throughout labor. But if a situation arises where the woman is niddah and there are no other available medical or support personnel, and she requires something that involves touch, such as wiping her brow or holding her hand to support her through a difficult contraction, the husband may fulfil this role, due to the halachic and medical importance of supporting a woman in labor. If at all possible, they should avoid direct contact (i.e., he should wear gloves or touch her through clothing).
If a woman feels strongly that she will specifically require her husband’s physical support due to their unique relationship, the couple should discuss the situation in advance with a halachic authority.
Where there is a medical need, as with an unplanned home delivery, the husband can and should do everything necessary to assist his wife, since this is a situation of danger to life, piku’ach nefesh.
Halachic opinions vary regarding whether the husband may cut the umbilical cord or whether this is considered a form of touch. If the placenta has already been expelled prior to the cord being cut, then there is halachic consensus that it is permissible for the husband to cut it.
