In memory of Chaya Mirel bat R’ Avraham

In memory of Chaya Mirel bat R' Avraham

Can a husband physically support his wife in labor?
20/03/2018

Question

Shalom!
Can a woman in labor be massaged, or have her hand held by her husband, etc, if that’s what she wants?
I am a doula, and a lot of couples I know are being advised that they are not permitted to touch at a certain point in the labor. However, I also know that many women deeply desire their husband to be there for them through hand holding or back rubbing. I always understood that a yoledet falls under pikuach nefesh and you can do anything necessary for her.
What is the halacha? Thanks!

Answer

The husband may have physical contact with his laboring wife until she is rendered niddah – either she experiences uterine bleeding, or if the contractions are so strong she is unable to walk around, or if she is fully dilated.
Once a woman is rendered niddah, the husband may not have physical contact with her unless it is absolutely necessary and there is no one else available to help her (e.g., if she is delivering in the car on the way to the hospital, obviously her husband can touch her). If both the husband and doula are attending to the laboring wife, from the point where the wife becomes niddah the doula should offer the physical support and the husband should offer emotional support.
Please feel free to get back to us with any further questions.

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