Mazal tov on your daughter’s wedding!
When doing
bedikot, your daughter should be as gentle as possible, and only insert her finger to a depth that is comfortable, ideally to the first knuckle. She should focus on checking the circumference of the vaginal canal, rotating her finger once to check the crevices and folds. In addition, she should try to obtain the extra-soft
bedikah cloths (there are some that resemble T-shirt material). If she still has difficulty, she may dampen the cloth slightly with water, or apply a small amount of water-based lubricant to the vagina a few minutes before the
bedikah.
It is common for virgin brides to experience some discomfort while doing the initial
bedikot. However, if she has extreme discomfort while inserting tampons or doing
bedikot, we recommend that she consult a gynecologist to rule out any conditions that might affect sexual intimacy (see our article
here).
Please contact us, or encourage your daughter to contact us, if we can be of further assistance.